As of late, I feel as if I am standing on a precipice of some sort. Starring over the edge into a fog.
I'm finally getting paid for some of my work in the theatre. I've found a good group of filmmakers who seem to be genuinely interested in my endeavors and also in a future work relationship. Aside from all of this, I have an audition coming up. An audition that is bigger than any I've had before. An audition that could be the start of more fruitful relationship. An audition that would be the first real step toward making a career of this art I can't seem to stop practicing.
Amid all of these thoughts are countless murmurings of doubt, fear and above all longing. I desperately long to make a success of myself. I've made a lot of tough choices in my life and I can't help but feel discouraged at times. I can't help but wonder if I made the right choices. If I'm meant to be doing what it is I'm working towards.
How does one cope with this inestimable and overwhelming desire that is equally matched by fear?
And I can't help but find it funny. All the times others have come to me with questions and asking for advice. All the times I've asked others. All the things I've experienced....
...All I know to do...is breathe.
Michael, At this point in time there is the possibility that you could win them over with your audition or not. Either way you will be successful. We have plenty of things to work on if it doesn't come through. You're on the right path, it may just take you on a few more side journeys before you reach your destination. :-)
ReplyDeleteI can't promise success, since I don't know how you would define it. And unfortunately a lot of success is due to happenstance and who can guarantee that? But...I can say with no risk of anyone who matters contradicting it that A-you are very talented B- you are very creative C- you are a genuinely good person who is a pleasure to be around (NOT always found with A & B, sad to say) and D- you certainly seem to have found a good group of friends who think the world of you, of which I am one.
ReplyDeleteFrom where I stand, you are a success. Hopefully you will one day also get as much in the way of fame and riches as you want to go along with it.